Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Insomnia... Fuck.

So, guess what?!

I'm setting up my own business. I know on here I'm a complete weirdo with a mouth like a sailor but I do actually have a soft side lol. I have a very caring side or so I'm told and (when I want) the patience of an angel- according to my Maa :D but yeah (hahaha my predictive text just wrote 'twat' instead of yeah... Idk why though) I started making the little toys because well... Okay we need to go back to me when I was three - I'm about the same height, my hair is shorter, my eyes are bigger and voice is still annoying as Hell. Im very ill, I have a very bad fever and my belly hurts so basically I'm just a poorly little girl. 

It's me and my Maa at home in our tiny little flat in Plymouth. She has to get me my medicine and I'm too ill to move but she has no one to leave me with so she puts me on the sofa, snuggled me down, puts the tv on and says "Moni, I want you to stay snuggled and not move, okay? Mummy needs to go and get your medicine, I won't be long- I promise". I was really good when I was little quite mature and really obedient so I did as I was told. Maa was back before I even finished the random show I was watching but she came bearing gifts. She got me a teddy. Like a proper teddybear with those arms that can move. He's like a proper old-school teddybear. I loved it the second I saw it. Maa gave it to me and I felt better. Like literally I felt better instantly. And me being me I had to name him something simple and weird so he was named Get Well. 

Get Well has been everywhere with me. School trips, hospital, holidays, Bangladesh, he even came to Leeds with me. I literally have been everywhere with him. 

I have had a few things in my life that have always been there - Get Well, my blanket and my fairy. They go everywhere with me and have been through everything in my life with me. I don't know what I would do if any of them broke or tore or lost them. I remember once my hubby asked me what I would do if he broke my fairy on purpose and I said I would cry my eyes out and not speak to him. Or if he threw my blanket away what would I do and I said that I would again cry and not talk to him. He was like oh :/

Those things are like a piece of me. Like everyone has some things that they have had for ages and that are sentimental but the people around me don't seem to. 

I know I digress but stay with me. 

My Maa lost her dad when she was very young and nobody really cared for her properly again after that. Her mother was very depressed after her husband died and just sort of cried a lot. My Maa just grew up after that. She made sure she was ready for school, she made sure she was clean and fed. She just sort of did her own thing. When she was 16 she married as was the way in those days and she had me a few years later. Her life just sort of tumble-weeded along. But she never had anyone give her anything that she could keep apart from God - he gave her me, my brother and my sister. So when I got interested in sewing I knew I had to make her something that she would keep forever. Something she never had to give up for anyone. Something that someone gave to her for no reason, not to apologise for anything but just because. So I made her Huggles (she named it). My sister has so many toys but not one that she is really attached to so I made her one too. I made my little brother a cat because he used to have a toy cat that we got from the Eden Project but it got lost. It was called jimmy and he was so upset so I made him something similar. And the I just thought I have to make one for all those people that I love. So I did. I made them for my uncles, my husband and my friend daughter. Then I thought... Hey... I love making these. I really love the feeling that I get when I have a finished product. I love the feeling I get when I give it to the person. Like they know that it was made just for them and no one else has it and I thought I'd like to do that for other people. 

So there it was - a cute idea in my head. I talked about it as a joke or as a flitting idea. But then my husband gave me insomnia. Like I'm not even kidding I caught it. I am basically the laziest person you have ever met. I can sleep like a new born baby but my husband is like a barn freaking owl. He stays up all night and it kills me, most times I can sleep through it but sometimes it leads to me being awake for to long and then not being able to sleep full stop. So yeah I'm up.

It's 4am on the 12th of May.

I'm wide awake O_O

So, my little stupid idea comes into my head. 

I start like outlining this whole idea. I gave it some shape. I gave it a name. And by 6am I had this fully formed idea in my head.... Well apart from the financial side of things but I have my Maa who has set up and run a number of successful restaurants and takeaways and my husband who has also set up businesses and works in finance himself. Both have had legal training (my husband very much more so). Both have very strong heads on their shoulders and understand the commercial world. So I basically have my own legal and financial team :D go me! Lol. 

No, I know I am so lucky to have them. My Maa is willing to finance my very elaborate new adventure, usually I want superficial things like electronics or clothes - I'm pretty sure this is the second biggest adventure I've asked her to support me on (first being my wedding... That was my very first adventure and she never asked me once to stick to a budget - Thank you, Maa).

I'm so excited. Mocho will have it's own blog and twitter so be sure to check it out.

Anyways, it's 4:49am and I have no Internet to post this so I'm just typing it up in my notes and watching a two part series on Coco Chanel and she just said my two favourite quotes...
"To be irreplaceable you have to be different"
And
"A women wearing the wrong perfume has no future".

Truer words were never spoken.

"A good women always know what to wear and knows an outfit can change your world"... Someone once said :D

"Never aim to look sexy or beautiful, always aspire to appear elegant - then you have inadvertently achieve the first two as well". 

What is your favourite quote?

Love,

Monica
            xxx

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