Friday, 9 May 2014

Exams, Wedding planning and 3 weeks.

I read that it takes the average bride-to-be 21 months to plan her wedding. I have helped plan two weddings, assisted at two and planned my own, bar mine they were very big affairs with loads of people and lots to plan and do- it still didn't take as long as that. I planned mine in about three weeks- I'd say; whilst at college, during my exams and I was still 18 at the time. I don't get what you girls are planning. It wasn't stressful, I wasn't a bridezilla. I didn't have any qualms with anything or anyone. It was a wonderful, relaxed planning and I found it great fun.

So I met my husband when I was just 17. We actually met at a wedding and we hit it off straight way, we got on really well. We spent the two days (one of them was actually Valentines' Day) together messing about, playing games just to pass the time, teasing eachother and just generally dicking about. My Maa figured he liked me then, something about the way he looked at me but I was pretty much in my own little world and didn't think anything of it.  A few months later we met again at yet another wedding which I was helping out at - I looked like hell, I had been taken into A&E after working myself to exhaustion to get the table settings at this damn wedding done and running around here, there and fucking everywhere for everyone that asked, I was in like day old clothes, my hair desperately needed a washing, I just looked like a little bag lady basically, but we got talking and again we got on really well. Now we aren't sure where this came from but he was told by a mutual friend that I was annoyed at him for not keeping in touch the first time we had met - not true. I hadn't even given him my number then, I hadn't even thought about it - people were forever coming in and out of my life at the time, it was hard to keep track of everyone (now I barely talk to anyone, it's so much easier) but yeah I wasn't annoyed but he thought I was and then he was given my number and he texted me a few times. I was busy at the time but responded the next day I think - he says I was playing hard to get, truth is I was tired. LOL.

We chatted non-stop for two weeks like everyday and accidentally ended up staying awake until like 1am texting so many times and we were both going through a lot at the time - I was starting college in September, he was getting promoted and we kept finding that the other was the one we wanted to tell first, which was big as far as we go. We kept texting eachother at the same time or just as the one was about to text, the other texted. Then something had changed and we both noticed it - we had fallen in love. That was about it. We just knew there and then - we were meant to be.

New years Eve, after he had spoken to my Maa, he got down on his knee and held both of my hands and asked me to marry him and I said yes (obviously). I won't lie I was tempted to fuck with him and say "no" lol! He was so nervous, bless him.

April we got islamically married- it was a traditional affair. Mosque, less than 10 people in attendance - the Imam read us our vows and we exchanged rings, my Maa did the catering. We all wore white. I planned that with my Maa in about a week - I think on the Tuesday I chose his ring in the first shop I went to but my Maa took me to like ten more to make sure it was the right one, two day later we had the date, Imam and mosque booked and paid for. Then at the weekend we went wedding shopping - I choose my dress in two hours, my bangles in 20 minutes, my shoes in about 10 minutes and we even had time for a nice meal too. We chose all of the Asian sweets and bought loads, it was a pretty fun, chill day.

June, like 2 weeks after my birthday (I was 19) we had our registry wedding ceremony - me and my Maa planned it all together, my husband was too busy with my ring and tbh didn't really mind at all what we did as long as at the end of it we were married - I was free to choose whatever I wanted. 

In the first week I choose my flowers on the way back from college - I think it took about 15 minutes, I told the lady I was getting married and I would need flowers and she asked me what types of flowers I had in mind and I already knew that lilies, white roses and gyphsophillia were my only requests, she opened the book up and showed me a beautiful cascade bouquet that was exactly what I wanted but with blue roses and she suggested filling it out with lots of green leaves and adding little gems to the centre of the flowers to pretty it up a bit and I was sold. I came home and told my Maa she came with me the next day to see the idea, it was reminiscent of her bouquet with less colour and more simplicity, we ordered them and paid for them and that was done, then we went to pick out the ring - I fell head over heels in love with one at the shop I had purchased the previous one but again my Maa took me to others just to make sure but about an hour later we came back and I got that one. My hair for the day was done by a wonderful stylist who was actually studying at my college at the time, I had been to so many salons the evening before and just couldn't click with anyone and it was really important to me that I liked the person because they would be apart of my wedding day and I needed them to be a good memory so I basically walked into the salon that the students used and asked the receptionists if any of the students would want to work on my hair for a wedding, she asked me to wait and then I was greeted by one of the teachers there she told me she has a girl in mind and that she would put me in touch with her, I meet Rheane the next day and got on with her like a house on fire, that weekend we did a trial and she knew exactly what I wanted - soft, romantic and styled natural and she got it spot on. She then introduced me to a colleague of hers: Freya- who was just amazing, we spoke on the phone and clicked straight away, she came the following weekend and we had a great time and she did my makeup beautifully. I was thrilled to have found such lovely people to begin my day with on the one of the happiest days of my life. My Maa sorted out the registry office I had picked in Mid Devon and helped me pick out singer for the day - I heard her voice on Youtube and was instantly in love, she agreed to sing songs that were so important to both, me and my husband, she was booked before my makeup trials. The cottage we decided to have the mehndi, reception and honeymoon at was picked, view and booked with in a few days. We chose and booked the hummer. The weekend after we went to buy my wedding dress, the first shop we walked into I saw it - my dress, exactly the way I wanted it. Perfect, detailed and just waiting for me, we went to the same shop I had gotten my last bangles and that was that. When we got back we got the girls that would be doing my mehndi, they were the only things that took a little searching - Exeter didn't have many henna artists apparently. My Maa would again be doing the catering, with the help of my uncle who was a full time chef. Jenni Benni would be taking pictures of the day, she takes stunning photos. We booked the black Hummer limousine after struggling to find a specifically black Hummer - it was something I was picky about, idk I just think limousines aren't as cool as they used to be and I wanted something a little different.

A few days before my wedding my husband drove down from the North. Two days before we got his suit, our shoes and the cupcakes. My Maa had a few bits and bobs to pick up too but otherwise we were all set and ready.

We all met up at the cottage the day before. My sister, brother, Maa, two uncles and three of my friends, and of course my husband and I but that was it. We had the girls that were doing my mehndi come over and we all sat at the table and giggled and talked, we ate and it was really cool. We wanted a really small, intimate wedding. It was great fun. The day was perfect. If you look back on the pictures we all look like we are having a great time- the only one who doesn't look happy is my Maa but she was giving her eldest daughter away so she can be excused plus she hadn't slept in weeks. But yeah - the cottage we stayed in was stunning, the grounds were wonderful and it even had a pool. The kids played in the pool the whole time!


The day was wonderful- I woke up early and had a really long bath; I really pampered myself - face mask, rose scented bath melt, hair mask. I really indulged. It was so good! I came out, got dressed in to pyjamas and went down stairs. My Maa and everyone were having breakfast. My sister and brother were flitting around my husband, at one point they were upstairs playing on the Wii, my uncles were around helping my Maa set the last finishing touches. My bridesmaid were awake so we piled into my room and started getting ready - Rheane and Freya arrived and got to work on my face and hair but we were still having a ball! My Maa was zipping around doing things. The Hummer arrived and we all were off to get us married! We had a great time in there too, all of us messing around, listening to music and having a laugh. The Mid Devon Registry office is beautiful, honestly it is stunning- we did all the official stuff and got back into the limo had a little mini party in the back!


Back at the cottage we all got changed into jeans and t-shirts and the celebrations and food began! My Maa and uncles had made loads! We ate, grabbed a cup cake, chilled by the pool, explored the grounds. In the afternoon Sarah Haseler - the vocalist we had chosen performed and I sat on my husbands lap as she sang some of the songs my husband and I had talked about when we first had started talking - DJ Sammy - Heaven (twilight mix), Leona Lewis - Run and so many more. 


It was the most perfect day I could have asked for, I wouldn't change any of the details. 


I opted for a small wedding for a few personal reasons but I'm glad a did because I was able to really enjoy it. I didn't have to worry about if anyone was happy or upset by something someone has said or done, I didn't have to worry about if there would be enough space or table settings, I didn't fuss over what people wore, I didn't have to worry about anything going wrong and it was still a June wedding, the weather was great, my dress was amazing and it was my day. Ladies, if it ends up being that stressful, honestly, is that what you want? To remember all the near-disasters? 


We did have to deal with everyone being annoyed at not being invited but as far as we were concerned it was our wedding and if you cared about us you would have wanted it to the way we wanted it, not the way you did.


Anyways, that was my wedding story. What is your dream wedding?


Love,


Monica

          xxx

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